My biggest problem is…
Is it possible to say that my biggest problem right now is an excess of options without sounding like an arsehole? Not really. Why? Because in analysis this is a shallow and worthless understanding of the concept of a problem.
I have been saying this to myself and other people for sometime now and each time I have to attach a disclaimer, an apology for sounding like an arsehole. It has taken me this time to realise that I had stopped exploring my circumstance having struck upon a convenient response that I could reel off and which, in doing so, I could take no blame for. After all, I had provided myself with a condition the cause of which was all these other people’s belief in my abilities and potential. Very flattering stuff. No wonder I was dragging it around with me.
I need to go deeper. If I have a problem it is with decisions not options. We are presented with hundreds of options daily and we make calls on those options sometimes with little or no thought and sometimes it takes a bit longer. In each case the process is the same. We evaluate the potential outcome until we are happy we can move forward.
Here’s my problem.
Have I stopped evaluating the outcome? Or am I evaluating it ad infinitum? The decisions I need to make are big ones. They deserve a proper process. I don’t have that process yet (or anymore? I don’t remember it being an issue in the past). But when I do I need to run it in full and make a choice because right now I am boring myself to shit.
And I know I can tolerate my nonsense a hell of a lot longer than most others can so I should probably apologise or STFU.