Weeknotes for 04/07/2011

by markversus

Man in bed with a coldThis post will not contain details of all achievements since the last Weeknotes and today. That would be difficult and silly and force me to make up a large amount. However, in keeping with the intention of the earlier posts I will give a little context to the absence of any post Weeknotes or otherwise.

In the gap between the last summary and this one I have found myself subject to an occasional but potent lack of focus that has managed to undermine all attempts at productivity that I have made in the last few months. On many occasions I have tried to kick-start myself back into something (usually with the idea of starting by catching up on Weeknotes) but this has not lasted more than a few days, sometimes hours. I am not certain of the root of this but at the moment it feels something like a virus that I keep treating with medicine only for it to come back having developed a resistance to the treatment. Each time it does I look for another way do fend it off and the cycle repeats. From now on I shall give my virus a name – Failpox.

Were this not a metaphorical bug but a real one, how would I go about treating it? First things first I would try to keep myself healthy. Eat and sleep well and exercise regularly. This practice applies without amendment IRL. I can try to eat and sleep better and exercise some (because I do zero exercise at the moment). I am sure that this will improve my spirits. On top of this I can exercise within the scope of the analogy by creating a trivial and repetitive ‘work’ exercise that I carry out to put me back in a work zone. More on this as I refine it, but for now I am going to call it 250 words a day, every day, on this site. I will put a specific tab under the blog menu item for them. If isn’t effective I will see how I can improve upon it.

I am also back to keeping a work journal (part of the reason this Weeknotes has actually materialised) which has already proved effective. Not that there is a huge amount in there for the week, but I am at least aware of what I am occupying my time with and when. At the moment I am feeling at a loss for accountability. I am a terrible boss to myself and an even worse employee. This will allow me to be specific when I am kicking myself. Or rewarding myself.

The reason that these particular bouts of Failpox have been so punishing is that I am currently not without abundant opportunity to succeed.  I have a some really exciting projects that require my time and energy. I should be able to muster more than I have been on the ideas alone. For some reason, however, I have found myself doing the opposite. Watching the opportunities and the energies slip away. Making bad choices and knowing they are bad when I am making them and not caring. I don’t know why this and I don’t like it, but I cannot rely on anyone else to get me to sort myself the eff out.  It’s not their job. It’s up to me.

All that being said, when you are sick it’s sometimes nice to have a person look after you and bring you chicken soup and fluff your pillow. It’s also sometimes necessary to have a person pull the blanket off you, crack a window, say you are stinking up the place and start running the shower. I’m more in need of the second someone, so boss me hereby authorises anyone holding an interest to dish out some tough love to employee me.

Together we can beat Failpox.